Here’s the problem (the only problem) with being David Beckham: Going undercover is very nearly impossible. That’s because when you’re as hot as fresh sh*t, there really isn’t any way to downplay that hotness, be it disguise or otherwise. But that’s exactly what The Ellen Degeneres Show tried to do last week, when they outfitted Mr. Beckham in a red polo and khakis and tried to convince customers he was just a regular ol’ Target employee and not a human Louis Vuitton garment bag made out of shark abs.
Nice try! Because even in this pitiful get-up, customers were like “Waaaiiiidaminuuuute. You’re David Beckham!” It doesn’t help that he was standing next to a giant sign with his name on it. Yes, people recognized him. But unlike myself in this situation, they did not force him to spread his seed via hot glue gunpoint. Shame indeed.